Zen and the Art of Secret Training

Thump, thump...

We all know the names of our local climbs and attack spots. Prospector, Barnes Back, Kelsey Sign, Qualifier, or Chili Bar, they become cult folklore. No one talks of them while riding, yet we all know they are coming. They are usually accompanied by a burn in your thighs and leave breakfast creeping back up. When your heart is beating two feet out of your chest someone digs and you are left to decide what to do. They mark who is on and who is not. When they come along in a ride you hope that you are there.

Thump, thump...

This town is too small to get away with secrecy. You've been spotted, seen, witnessed, trying to do just a little more. Out there on your own, getting the job done. Hoping that your secret mix of training will put you just a little ahead of everyone else. I can't say how happy it makes me to know that the groups rides are no longer good enough. No, instead, I now see, as do you, the occasional recognizable jersey out on a solo mission. We all know that there are too many reasons to escape on to the bike these days. But the missions I am catching glimpses of, don't look like an escape. They look pretty deliberate, they look hard. And we all know when we see one or another out there alone, we think, "what is he doing, how fast is he going, could I hang?". Then when we meet on Tuesday or Sunday we hope our secret formula will carry us a little fast and longer than yours.

Thump, thump...

I wonder if those in the pro peleton get this? I think they do, unfortunately, I think they are just better at it than we are! However, I think there is a part they don't get. They don't understand that when the attack goes and I stay with it, I hold my head a little higher, I hug my kids a little tighter, I enjoy the beer after the ride a little more, not because I won, but because I achieved balance. At that moment, at that spot, for that second, all they things I need to do in my day, all they commitments I have, all the stress and turmoil finds balance and I can hammer on the pedals. Cycling is not my job, it is my passion. We all sink too much time and money into our passion. On those moments, when it is right and good, and we are flying in front of the group, it's worth every second and cent. No way the pro's get that.

Thump, thump...

When it goes, will I be there? The greatest part about this game is that sometimes I can't follow. The mind may be willing but the body stops. Who knows, maybe I was up with a sick kid at 3 am and still made the ride, maybe work is kicking my ass, maybe my secret formula wasn't right...who knows? But I can't always go. When I can't, I know those up front will wait and encourage me to fight another day.

Thump, thump...

I have just gotten home from a solo run. It is at these times that I am acutely aware of my body. But I will never tell you how I am feeling! How long was I out? That's for me to know. How do the legs feel? You may find out tomorrow but you will have to break me to learn. The attacks will come, they always do. Has my secret formula been working for me, has yours?. That jersey I saw hammering the unnamed hill on Friday, was that too much. When someone lashes out and puts the hurt on all of us, will I be able to follow?

Will you?