Monday, June 24, 2013

Cool Twenty Four

Noobie was hiding in his tent applying, mumbling incoherently, and slathering his ass with chamois butter when I arrived at Coolest 24 Camp FT3. He had already ridden over 60 miles and the sun was starting to broil his brain. To entertain the assembled onlookers he swallowed half a dozen pills, chugged a coke, and then wretched.

The task before me was no less daunting: to finish 24 cool PBRs. Without wasting any time I settled into a lawn chair and popped the first tab. Fortunately, Noob’s demands didn’t slow me from reaching my goal. I whooped when he rolled into camp and whooped when he left. I topped off a water bottle or two and greased his chain a couple times. It quickly became apparent that Mrs. Noob was not going to live up to her potential and help the PBRs disappear. In fact, at sundown, she gathered up all the bedding in camp and settled in for a good night’s sleep. I moved my lawn chair to the neighbor’s camp, but they weren’t much help either. Somewhere after 1am, I stumbled into my tent. I overheard Noob dismissing the assistant wrench and he napped as well. Maybe he wasn’t going to win, maybe I wouldn’t finish my PBRs, it was a dark hour.

I woke with a start at 4am. I saw that the Sokuri was gone, so I settled back into my chair and returned to the half-finished beer tucked amongst the star thistle. The moon shone like a spotlight over the quiet camp. Finally Noob returned. He had thrown down three hard laps to cement his lead. Now he just had to keep turning over his pedals for another seven hours. As the eastern sky began to glow, I found my resolve and finally finished another beer. By 8am Noob was ready to quit. However, Rock God and his young lover B showed up to add to the cheering section. What’s more Mrs. Noob had finally emerged from the tent, recalling a nightmare of naked buttocks looking like a bagel schmeared with cream cheese. Two hours to go, and it was time for a little tough love. When Noob begged to stop, I told him that he could either do another lap or help break down camp. Poor kid ended up doing both. But, he won.      

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Tuesday's ride is just around the corner

June 15, 2013 – Sierra Century

With Captain out and Nocar attending Peter’s cookie baking seminar, Green Fro and I met up at the Squito lot for a carpool to Plymouth.  We arrived just in time to register and meet up with RG and NoHandle.  A 6:45AM departure was in order.  Since RG was taking the pulls in the front, we managed to get to the first rest stop at the 20 mile marker with an average of 22.5 mph!!  Strava records were definitely broken here!  A quick re-fuel and regroup and we were all off again.  The pace continued to move briskly while the fast people took turns up front.  Another rest stop at around 46 mile marker helped us refuel again.  Lunch was at the 60 mile marker and the group enjoyed turkey sandwiches.  The pace after lunch was much easier!   At around 70 miles, RG had to turn back to the car due to prior afternoon obligations.  Slug Gulch climb hit us a little after that.  I stayed in the back of the pack with No Handle as Green Fro and No Handle’s friend from Berkeley took off up the climb.  A rest stop at the school helped us regroup.  Popsicles were in order at that stop and we received a Slug Gulch pin for completion.  The descent back down Omo Rach was quick!  After turning on Mt. Aukum road, there were only 4 of us remaining (No Handle, NoHandle’s friend, Green Fro, myself).  Since we had about 10 miles to go at this point, I took turns at the front pulling.  Eventually our pack of 4 blew apart and I found myself riding with No Handle’s friend off the front to the finish.  With highs of less than 90 degrees F and calm winds, the day was fantastic for cycling!

As for Tuesday night’s FT3, I’m out.  Are you in?

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Tuesday's back AGAIN!

With a blessed break from the intense heat, this Tuesday night should provide great temps for Polly Wood trail sampling.  After a debouched ride on Saturday in the Strawberry region, I will certainly be looking forward to pedaling the bike rather than cursing an induced headache while pushing the stead up the hills. 

In prep for the coolest 24, I will be heading up to the knott lot around 2:30 to 3:00 to get some pre riding in.  Any who can join, please do.

If a tree branch randomly falls off a tree and hits a FT3 rider in the head, does it make a sound?

Will B have new wheels?

Will NoCar show off his one new wheel?

Will we have a surprise LotB visit?

Oh the suspense!


Tuesday, June 4, 2013


Another Tuesday, another opportunity to go prance about in the Pollywood hills. 

'Today's count off will begin with a hearty 'aught', have fun prancing. NoCar back channeled that he is out as well. It's SSFT3, keep it real, pre-br, tape off those shifters, dust off the old soldier...